I Say Otrovert!

He says Introvert. She says Extrovert. I say OTROVERT.

For years, we’ve been told we fall into one of two camps. 

Introvert or extrovert. 

You either recharge alone or you recharge in a crowd. You dread networking events or you thrive in them. You slip out early (aka ghosting) or you’re the last one standing, holding court by the bar. 

But what if neither label quite fits anymore? 

I recently came across a newer term that stopped me in my tracks: otrovert. And the more I sat with it, the more it felt uncomfortably accurate - in the best possible way. Otrovert is a personality type coined in 2025 by psychiatrist Dr. Rami Kaminski to describe individuals who don’t draw energy from groups or from belonging to a crowd, but from deep, one-on-one connection. Not isolated. Not antisocial. Not shy. Just nourished differently. 

And if I’m honest, this idea resonates with me deeply. Especially now. 

When I was younger, I loved group dynamics. Dinners with eight people around the table. Committee meetings. Community gatherings. Fundraising galas. Rooms buzzing with conversation. 

I fed off that energy. It felt stimulating and expansive and alive. 

Somewhere along the way, that changed. 

These days, I barely enjoy a girls’ night out with six women. Not because I don’t love them. I do. But because the experience often feels scattered. Conversations are half-finished. It’s hard to get past the surface. I go home feeling a bit drained. 

But put me across the table from one person, over coffee, lunch, or dinner, and it’s a completely different story. 

Those one-on-one moments mean the world to me now. 

That’s where I feel present. That’s where I listen better. That’s where stories unfold. I walk away feeling energized.  

What I find interesting is that this seems to hold true whether we’re talking about personal life or professional life. The setting may change, but the outcome is often the same. 

There’s something freeing about realizing you don’t have to keep up with the pace that used to feel normal. That it’s okay if what fulfills you now looks different than it once did. Connection doesn’t have to be loud to count. It doesn’t have to be public to be real. 

These days, I’d take one honest conversation over ten surface-level ones without hesitation. 

There’s something freeing about realizing you don’t have to keep up with the pace that used to feel normal. That it’s okay if what fulfills you now looks different than it once did. Connection doesn’t have to be loud to count. It doesn’t have to be public to be real. 

These days, I’d take one honest conversation over ten surface-level ones without hesitation. 

And while the world still seems to reward the room, the group, the crowd, I’ve come to appreciate something else entirely - the small table, the deeper conversation, the kind of exchange where you lose track of time because you’re fully present.   

So I don’t view fewer people as less connection.  It’s actually more meaningful.   

If you’ve ever left a packed event feeling oddly empty but walked away from a simple coffee date feeling completely restored, you might be an otrovert too! 

And honestly? It’s a pretty wonderful way to move through the world. 

If this resonates, share this column with a friend or coworker and ask them one simple question: Which one are you? I’d love to hear what you discover at stacy@fireflyforyou.com.